Teacher: So what conclusion did your group come to? Did you prevent the war?
Me: Well, we decided that in the interests of China the opium trade must be completely disbanded, but we’re going to compensate the British for the opium we seized and destroyed. Also we’re ceding two ports where the British will be able to live year-round and extraterritoriality will apply, as well as establishing British embassies in two major trade ports. Oh, and we’ve added a Unicorn Clause, so the British have to make one when the technology is available.
negotiating…like a boss.
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